No time.

It’s ok, really because time isn’t real in the first place and although I know that you understand that concept, you still live within the constraints of it all, or so you say you do.

We are timeless, so time means nothing. 

cp’14

Shields On.

When you allow someone to irk you, piss you off, take you out of your zone, or just annoy you, you must understand that this has less to do with the person you see as the culprit and more to do with your lack of self control over the state of your own mind. 

When someone comes into a room, forget whether you like them or not, and simply learn to let their energy not reach you. Let their energy bounce off of your own personal shield. Let the energy that does manage to touch you simply roll off of your shoulders. In fact, ignore their energy because it is only when you pay it any mind that it begins to affect you. 

Why do you pay pointless people any mind at all? Answer that question, and then realize that it is you that is being tedious. So who then really needs the attention? Is it the louder individual that seeks it all the time, or you, in that moment, for allowing it to even affect you.

Stay happy. It’s actually much easier than you think to do so. 

Smile. 

CP’14

Cyrus Pavel. 

Aloof in NYC.

Like the title? Yea, me too. 

This post is not about what you think, so just keep reading. 

I saw a woman walking to work in the morning, gracefully and aware of everything in her path. Smoothly, she ducked into the subway, seamlessly swept her metro through the turnstile, and as she approached the closing doors of the train that had already pulled in, an overly confident girl is taking her smooth time to walk into the super packed 1 train headed downtown. The overly confident girl aloofly staggers into the car and simply stops at the doorway, blocking the woman behind her from getting in, all while staring profoundly into her iPhone. Clueless as to what had just transpired behind her, the overly confident girl continued with her day and plans of having coffee with her friend… 

Meanwhile, that graceful woman behind her was left on the train station to wait for the next train which was 6 minutes away. “6 minutes will make me late”, she thought. You see, this woman always carefully curates her timing daily. She’s calculated the exact amount of minutes that it takes her to get from her doorstep to work, granted that there are zero unforeseen miscalculations. A “miscalculation” in this case would be something like having too much class to invade another person’s personal space by pushing them in or tapping them on the shoulder; not to mention that if she had risked touching her the train doors might have snapped at her hand. 

Some bosses are like teachers, and some teachers are like corporate bosses. Some bosses are like teenagers, others are teenagers, and some are way older than there actual age, observing and comparing everything to the Golden Ages, for which to them, as you guessed it, passed long ago. This graceful woman that got stuck on 79th Street, and would already be 3 minutes late to work, has the kind of boss that hates “tardiness”. You remember? Like those teachers you had all throughout your academic career. Anyway, that was her boss: "Five Minutes!, and anything under that is acceptable, but NEVER anything more"

Out of the train down on 14th Street and up the stairs into the street, the woman rushes towards the west side. Suddenly, the foot traffic on the sidewalk is jammed. Tourists hogging up both sides of the sidewalk, taking their time, clueless to the rule of walking and keeping to your right. Again, another aloof girl into her smartphone, taking her precious time to meet a friend for brunch, and, completely oblivious that she is walking on the left side of the sidewalk towards all of the people that need to get to their jobs; some with cool bosses, others with miserable ones, but work was the destination and the aloof girl was just too involved in her own world to care for anyone else’s. 

This is what we have become. 

Friends that ask you to have dinner with them only so that they can talk to you from the side as they switch between iPhones, Blackberrys, and Droid devices. If you’re really lucky, your friend has them all plus a tablet. 

In the past, hanging out used to be about the energy that the people you are “hanging" with made you feel. It had nothing to do with anyone else’s business, but more to do with ideas, energy and dreams. 

Now, it seems like it’s all a matter of what one person can do for the other. 

I once heard that “nothing is free”. If I “fear nothing”, then am I not “free” CP’14

Cyrus Pavel

in New York.

New York is a city of hustlers. Actually, it’s a Hustler’s city, but in all actuality is it just a city full of hustlers. 

Driving up Flatbush back into the city tonight, I felt nostalgic. The last time I was driving up Flatbush and into the city from Brooklyn, I had been at a baby shower for a great friend of mine. This must have been back in the mid to late nineties. Anyway, I was driving up from that baby shower and into the city to meet a girl, and I was bumping some good ole reggae.

Tonight, as we hopped into the taxi and back into the city from Flatbush, the Uber driver was groovin’ to some good ole reggae, and as we zipped up the Ave heading back into the city, I could not stop thinking: “how beautiful has my life here always been?" because decades later, it’s still just as beautiful as before. 

Sometimes my mind goes away from NYC and recalls all of the other places in the world that I have been to, lived in, and seen with these own two eyes, but then when NYC is like this I always think that there is nothing more magical and more amazing than New York City because the truth is that there just isn’t. 

I wonder some days if I will ever stop being infatuated with her, but I just don’t see that happening ever. 

CP’14

Cyrus Pavel. 

overcome.

When life seems like a storm just think about all of the real ones you have been through in your lifetime, and then remember how at the end of them you got along just fine, sometimes as if nothing happened at all. 

Our ability to become as resilient as we want to be is what makes us different than all other species that have ever existed. 

Resiliency isn’t in the body or in the physical aspects of our being, but more in our minds. This is why no one could ever truly hurt us because it is “us” that allow our own minds to hurt themselves. 

Don’t follow the norm because everyone you know can tell you where those paths lead. Instead, follow the roads and paths that no one has dared to walk on because those are precisely the ones that only you can show yourself where they may end up. 

cp’14

Cyrus Pavel. 

Hands-Free.

I think that letting go of something you absolutely adore because they no longer want to be held onto is different than anything I’ve ever been taught. Last night I got caught up in a moment where the fantasy of a potential future took over my now. I wasn’t stressed, but more of in a happy place; a place where the sun was shining bright, the skies were that shade of blue that I love them to be, the grass was green, her smile was perfect, and everything was peachy. I quickly then snapped back into reality to understand that these fantasies that we live in our heads only exist there, and that no one could ever see them the way we do because we just don’t have the tech to illustrate it for the world yet. 

I realized that letting go of these loves that no longer want to be held onto is more about us finding out that when you completely remove all of your energy away from someone, you leave a void in them. Later on, it is up to them to determine whether that void can be filled by another energy, or, if that void is much too strong for them to continue to live with. 

If you do not remove one’s self from that situation completely, you do not allow that person to be free of your energy, which means that you don’t let them have the space and air they need to miss you, or even know that they could. 

It’s true that if you love someone and they want to be let go of your hold, that you should do it, but when you do it please remember that you must be ready, willing and able to completely let go. That means almost annihilating their existence in your mind. Also, remember that you’re not doing this because you don’t love them, but because you love them as much as you think and say that you do. 

cp’14

Cyrus Pavel. 

Newlyloves.

If you ask two people in love they will both give you very different versions of their love story. Everyone sees things differently, so vantage points are so important that way in building a sustainable love. 

I hate to use the word “sustainable” when speaking about love, but it’s really the only word that can describe the kind of love that most people out there are searching for. 

A sustainable love is a love that lasts forever. It’s the love story that has no ending because it cannot be written yet. A sustainable love is “old school” in the sense that these are the kinds of loves we grew up hearing about from our parents and grandparents. They were the kind of loves that lasted a decade or more through world wars without seeing one another, surviving only on pure love and respect for the other. The sort of love that kept itself pure for the one person it truly loved. 

If you ask two people in love why they love the other person, and how much they love them, they will both give you very different answers. If you ask two people that have loved several people before, they will tell you that after some time the faces don’t matter anymore because you can insert just about anyone into the love story, and make an entirely different new one. For me, the beauty about love is the entirely different new experiences I take with each new love. 

Don’t go to the same restaurants, don’t watch the same movies, don’t take them to places that you have already been—ever because that would be like buying a new book only to read the same thing. 

Love newly; love differently. 

cp’14

Cyrus Pavel. 

“The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference. The opposite of beauty is not ugliness, it’s indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it’s indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, but indifference between life and death.”
— Elie Wiesel

He Can Only Hold Her.

Crawling the interweb like I was Spiderman last night, I figured out that I had somehow missed the whole entire last half to the last season of Mad Men (Season 6). When I made this discovery I felt as if I were a teenage boy again who had just found a crisp $100 bill in the fold of one of his pocket jeans that were ready to go to the laundry. So, I did what any of you would have done and went out to get a bottle of red wine to get ready to watch some of the treasures that had just surfaced. 

On my way back from scooping up one of my favorite Sangiovese’s, I saw a tall brunette walking a little dog. She was in my path so I had no choice but to notice her, and then right after that I noticed her brilliant smile. Instantly, she reminded me of a former energy that was prominent in my life some time ago. She had the same exact sort of smile; the kind of smile that reels you right in, helplessly, into her orbit, and the kind of smile that intrigues you from the very start. 

I then began to reminisce, slightly, about this past energy, only to remember that this is one of the various things that I enjoyed, and loved, so much about it:her ability to smile at the world. Her ability to do so was beyond uncanny. It didn’t matter where we went or who we were with, she would pull all types of people from all sorts of walks of life into her orbit, and not one of them would ever mind. 

I love energy like that. Energy that regardless of what is happening in their life, can still look, feel, and be authentically happy at the world. That’s the kind of energy that I am in search of for myself. I mean, what’s cooler than going out into the world each day, smiling at everything in site and receiving that same beautiful, happy energy all day from everyone you set your eyes on, engage with, and encounter in general? I’ll tell you what: nothing

Sometimes I wonder how she’s doing, and if she’s happy with who she is with these days. Sometimes, inside, buried deeply, I regret not being able to have learned the lessons that I needed to learn much faster because then, maybe, I would have access to that sort of beautifully-happy, and always-smiling energy, daily. 

The one thing that I do know, is that with or without me, her energy will always continue to be the same, and like I said before: that is just one of the many things that I will always love about her, and one of the many things that I am still in search of for myself.

CP’14

Cyrus Pavel

Why so serious?

She taught me that dinner didn’t have to be so traditional. That we could eat fat little round cherry tomatoes with slices of prosciutto using our hands, and dip the freshly baked bread from down the road right into the aged balsamic and olive oil, and that we could call that dinner just as long as we stared at the coast, talked, sipped on some wine, and kissed all night. 

She taught me that breakfast didn’t have to be so formal. That we could throw in a little spirit into our coffees and teas, and mix them in with our granola and fruits. 

She taught me that love didn’t have to be so technical. That we could walk down the winding roads of the coast, hand in hand, saying absolutely nothing for long periods of time just as long as we knew exactly what one another was thinking the entire way. 

She taught me that everything I ever knew could be different. 

cp’14

Cyrus Pavel.

ignorantly happy

You control your thoughts, essentially controlling the energy that you attract because of your thoughts as well. Does that concept make any sense to you? 

Basically, if you are thinking negatively about something, then you are already putting your own energy into a negative shadow, therefore attracting, by your own mind, all of the more negative energies around you into your space. What you are also doing is deflecting all of the positive energy around you because the positive energies can feel the darkness of the negative, so they tend to steer clear of your negative path. 

A happy person that is smiling as they walk your way on the street will most likely avoid you if you have a sour puss face on, or just an angry one. 

You control your thoughts, and the more negative they are, the more negative things will keep happening to you. 

Ignorance is bliss, so be ignorantly happy, at all times because why not?

Identity Theft.

You have to practice controlling your own thoughts the same way you would practice riding a skateboard, or a bike. You have to practice every day, for several hours a day, getting back on track whenever you fall, learning about the things that make you fall, learning the signs that become your instinct and how to read them in order to counter what will happen. 

Very rarely do elders show us how to control ourselves, but part of the process of escaping the ruts that many of you find yourselves in, is simply to practice control over your thoughts. Whenever you start thinking about something that you shouldn’t be thinking, simply change the thought. Annihilate it actually because that is the only way to get it out of your system forever. 

The mind can be way too opened to suggestive poisoning, which is why if your ideas aren’t strong, and your self control over your own thoughts isn’t strong enough, you can fall victim to true identity theft. 

Identity theft in this case is when suggestive poisoning, or manipulation of your thoughts takes over your mind, and it is where you don’t even know if the ideas you have are your own, or implanted by someone else. 

Scary thought, right? 

You have been a victim of this for some time now, but there is still enough room to change it back. Become your own person. 

CP’14

Cyrus Pavel.

Half of 1.

What you love, somebody else hates. What you think is good, someone else thinks sucks. 

Why is it that you feel the need to voice your opinions about things when no one really gives a fuck. I know. It’s because you somehow feel that you are that influential to the world that your opinion matters, and that this opinion of yours will actually change others opinions on the subject, and then eventually you will have changed the world. The problem is that you are delusional because you are nothing and nobody.

Here, let me explain it in the simplest form for you so that you may understand it well. You don’t influence any influencers. You barely influence any of the true friends that you still have left because let’s be honest here, you barely have any of those as it is, and you completely understand it. 

When your BFF is anything less than at least a decade in at that position, well that tells me there is a red flag somewhere, but I digress. 

The point is that you are entitled to your opinions, and that’s completely o.k., but other than that just shut the fuck up and keep those opinions to yourself, and maybe your BFF because nobody else out in the world gives two shits, let alone even half of 1. 

CP’14

Cyrus Pavel